Paradise is . . . not being afraid to be your own person

By now, it seems that anyone with young children knows about the movie Frozen. Both of my daughters saw the movie recently and were enamored, especially with the hit song, "Let it Go". The other day, my youngest daughter grabbed a pink sheet, a black dress, and some socks in order to put together this outfit to resemble the character Elsa. She wore it most of the morning, regardless of the activity. As I watched her marching around the house and in and out the front door, I couldn't help but feel a little bit sad. How much time is left until she no longer is comfortable dressing up and acting like whomever she pleases?

I'm finding life as an adult to be exhausting in ways I had not imagined. The path we choose in life is ours alone. My wife and I, like all people, had to make tough decisions about where to live, career paths to follow, how to educate our children, etc. I'm struck by how many people judge those decisions, provide unsolicited advice, and even take offense when the road we are on differs from theirs. Society can, at times, feel like one big bully. It's not easy to be your own person, to carve your own trail, to do something outside of what society has deemed the norm. To constantly find yourself in a defensive position, explaining to others why you don't necessarily want what they want, is tiring.

In the past, I was easily influenced or angered when unfairly judged by others. In fact, looking back, there were risks I should have taken, paths I should have followed, that I avoided out of fear of what others might think or say. Recently, finally, I've learned that the best thing I can do is live my life according to my values and what makes me and my family feel happy and fulfilled. There will always be those, maybe even the majority, who disagree or take issue with those decisions. However, if you live a life based on your design, there will be those inspired to do the same. And that's how you can change the world.

Right now, my youngest daughters are listening to their new favorite song. They are spinning and dancing, comfortable with everything about who they are. That's my dream for them today and always. As for me, I have a new mantra when others are critical of my path in life: I simply "let it go".

Paradise is . . . helping someone achieve a goal.

There is certainly an indescribable joy that one feels when accomplishing a goal. However, one of life's greatest gifts is to have the opportunity to help someone else achieve hers. My youngest daughter worked hard this past week, taking a couple of spills in the process. I watched her confidence grow with each sprint up and down the sidewalk until I finally decided it was time to let go. She wobbled a little but eventually straightened out and took off on her own with me following a step behind. 

In El Paraíso, as the book documents, Cristina and I had the opportunity to work with two leadership groups. A goal was set, and we all worked together to assure it became a reality. I will never forget the feeling of watching our students confidently speak with other youth about the dangers of HIV and AIDS. When they had completed their presentation, the children expressed excitement and satisfaction at having accomplished something special. I sat in the back of the room absorbing every second and recognizing that helping them succeed felt better than anything I had ever accomplished on my own. 

Now, I feel that same joy watching my daughter pull away from my guiding arms. It happened faster than I'd hoped, but what a gift to have had the opportunity to help her learn to ride a bike.

Thank you, as always, for stopping by. Please share your PIFOM moment from the week in the comments below and have a wonderful weekend.

Paradise is . . . my daughter, her bike, and me.

Since the day my first daughter was born, I dreamed about the day I'd get to help her learn to ride a bike. I recall vividly the days my dad spent running up and down the bike path behind our house, attempting to teach me to ride. Unfortunately for me, my first daughter learned to ride her bike in about 10 minutes. The entire event was enjoyable yet anticlimactic at the same time. 

Well, I'm blessed with a second daughter, and she is just learning to ride her bike. Recently, she stood next to it and told me it was time to remove the training wheels. We've spent the last few days practicing on the sidewalk in front of our house. She's getting better each day, and I'm trying to cherish every second of our time together with her bike. Thursday, for the first time, she rode about three feet on her own before I had to catch her from tipping over. The smile on her face, that look of satisfaction from having just accomplished something great, was priceless. Selfishly, I hope she doesn't learn to ride that bike too quickly. I want a little more time, but isn't that always the case.

Paradise is . . . the excitement of seeing someone you love.

My wife, Cristina, recently returned from a week-long trip out west. My two daughters and I were waiting for her in the car at the airport. All three of us were watching the doors excitedly. Finally, she emerged. My oldest daughter jumped out of her car seat and ran to greet Cristina. In my excitement, I hopped out as well, preparing to embrace her. Then, I heard my youngest daughter from the back seat, still strapped into her car seat. "Hey, what about me?" she yelled. She was giggling uncontrollably as I unstrapped her and set her free to go jump on Mom. What a wonderful moment. It's a reminder that we are blessed to have that person in our life, the one we love and who loves us back. It's one of life's most beautiful moments, to be overjoyed to see someone you have been missing and know they are just as excited to see you.